Thank you for the bonus content, fun to see the differences and development. Maybe I’m biased since I love to pray the rosary, but I really enjoyed the additional content. A fun surprise at the end too with the “child” Tabitha arriving at his home. Well done.
I appreciate the insight shared about the changes. The rosary is a lovely addition and improves the story greatly.
I also appreciate the removal of the butt crack! 😂
My suggestions:
1. There was no mere light frosting upon his beard or of the hair above his ears in a gradual and less inconspicuous way.
I believe it should say “less conspicuous”
2. He then forced his attention to the clatter of his home.
…clutter…
3. “I have a flight a flight in just a few hours.”
“a flight” is duplicated.
4. …by entering into an alternative history…
Might be personal choice, but I prefer to say “alternate” instead of “alternative” in this case.
5. But you must not never let them manipulate mankind’s past.
“not never” should be “not” or “never” not both.
Thank you for the bonus content, fun to see the differences and development. Maybe I’m biased since I love to pray the rosary, but I really enjoyed the additional content. A fun surprise at the end too with the “child” Tabitha arriving at his home. Well done.