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Sheryl Robinson's avatar

Missing quote. throat again. “I can’t

Lisa's avatar

1.

…to join her and Tabitha on three floors below.

I think leaving out “on” would sound better.

2.

“Is Mom and Dad there with you?”

Should be “Are Mom and Dad…”

3.

…a black hole - the same one that had chased them down the narrow concrete hallways of ENH like a mammoth pulsing black orb — was…

This is just an example of mismatched dashes.

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