Like her office, the magnetic laboratory facility was also remarkably unchanged from when Becca last stood there just weeks before, even though more than forty years had passed between then and now.
1.
…and struggled to find the inertia to move forward in her work.
Since inertia means to remain in its current state, I believe this might sound better:
…and struggled to overcome the inertia and move forward in her work.
Or replace “inertia” with “momentum” or “motivation” in the original sentence.
2.
…a creme-colored silk gown…
Should this be “cream-colored”?
3.
…when she realized this man was willing to commit everything he’d ever worked for and would give it all to her.
The word “commit” tripped me up here. Not exactly sure what would be best:
…willing to commit everything he’d ever worked for to her.
Or:
…willing to give her everything he’d ever worked for.
4.
…and out of curiosity from the line curling out the door.
It doesn’t seem like we have “curiosity from” something…maybe “curiosity about” or “curiosity with” something.
1.
…and struggled to find the inertia to move forward in her work.
Since inertia means to remain in its current state, I believe this might sound better:
…and struggled to overcome the inertia and move forward in her work.
Or replace “inertia” with “momentum” or “motivation” in the original sentence.
2.
…a creme-colored silk gown…
Should this be “cream-colored”?
3.
…when she realized this man was willing to commit everything he’d ever worked for and would give it all to her.
The word “commit” tripped me up here. Not exactly sure what would be best:
…willing to commit everything he’d ever worked for to her.
Or:
…willing to give her everything he’d ever worked for.
4.
…and out of curiosity from the line curling out the door.
It doesn’t seem like we have “curiosity from” something…maybe “curiosity about” or “curiosity with” something.