…who’d stumbled upon the smell of baking bread and tomato sauce, sausage and sautéed onions.
I haven’t done an exhaustive search, but it seems like you may prefer the Oxford comma. I’ve seen it elsewhere. If so, then add a comma after “sausage.”
2.
The air grew more chilled with each step of their spiraling decline.
Personal preference probably, but I prefer “descent” instead of “decline.”
3.
…as if there was nothing else holding her from falling.
Personal preference again? I prefer “keeping” instead of “holding.”
And oh my gosh, I was not expecting Becca to drug Gordon! What’s happening?!!!
1.
…who’d stumbled upon the smell of baking bread and tomato sauce, sausage and sautéed onions.
I haven’t done an exhaustive search, but it seems like you may prefer the Oxford comma. I’ve seen it elsewhere. If so, then add a comma after “sausage.”
2.
The air grew more chilled with each step of their spiraling decline.
Personal preference probably, but I prefer “descent” instead of “decline.”
3.
…as if there was nothing else holding her from falling.
Personal preference again? I prefer “keeping” instead of “holding.”
And oh my gosh, I was not expecting Becca to drug Gordon! What’s happening?!!!